Lyrics

12) Dry County Yodel - m.litton

Well I’s singin’ in a barroom out on them western plains
Up stepped a little lady, her eyes was full of pain
She said “Tonight my heart feels like a dead dog on the road
“So please, don’t play slow, cuz I only wants to jostle-bostle
“Step ‘n fetch a bottle, flash my eyes at some big fellow
“I’m tired of feelin’ so damn low
“I only wants to wiggle, spin it on a nickel
“Swing my hips like a musical cello
“I’m gonna dance tonight even if I dance alone”
So I yodel-yodel-yodeled…yodeled for the sad lady

There came on a blue norther, you could hear howlin wind
The door fell open, a big cowboy waltzed in
He whoopeed “It’s Friday, I’m fresh in from the ranch
“So mister, don’t play sad, cuz I only wants to jostle-bostle
“Step ‘n fetch a bottle, skip to my lou, forget about the cattle
“I’m here to lose them cowboy blues
“Been sleepin’ on my cot alone a lot
“And I’m hot to unzip a thought
“Gonna dance with every lady in this lowdown saloon”
So I yodel-yodel-yodeled…yodeled for the cowboy too

Now I’s set to go by midnight, thought my gig was done
When this good ol’ boy come grabbed my arm ‘n said
“Howdy-do there, son…say there’s a great big show
“Down at my ol’ red barn where you can play till dawn
“Cuz we only wants to jostle-bostle, step ‘n fetch a bottle
“Don’t wanna lay our heads on a pillow
“This town’s been dry 30 years till this afternoon
“I’ll play my fiddle while you spin your riddles
“Come on down now, be a good fellow
“Whole damn county’s there tonight catchin’ up on booze”
So I yodel-yodel-yodeled…yodeled on down to the show

They was swingin’ from the rafters ‘n wrestlin’ in the hay
There was more umm-umm goin’ on than I’d care to say
Finally down in my throat little frog jumped on the horse
And I pleaded “I can’t sing no more, don’t wanna jostle-bostle
“Or step ‘n fetch a bottle, just wanna ease off on the throttle
“My fingers are blistered, my tongue can’t even spit”
Then this ol’ geezer jumped up, fed me whiskey from his cup
Called his pretty daughter to help me getty-up
She whispered the sweetest words that can a virgin’s lips
I yodel-yodel-yodeled…the little bird was chirpin’ half past 3

Well I kept a’singin’ dreamin’ about that pretty miss
But as things turned out I never even got a kiss
That big cowboy cut ‘er out just like a brown-eyed calf
He led her to the loft for a little laugh
They jostled ‘n they bostled in the shadows
That young gal didn’t even battle
Next I saw was a big two-barrel in the hands of her ol’ man
He said “See my thumb on the gun, chum, don’t be dumb ‘n run
“Cuz you’re gonna be my son-in-law ‘n I’m gonna be your dad”
And I yodel-yodel-yodeled…yodeled at the cowboy’s wedding